belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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