My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize