Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
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