Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Why did my mother make you get naked?
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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