im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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