i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize