lets start a swedish sibling band together
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
time to smoke my breakfast
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Randomize
