Swine flu. Run for my life!
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize