So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
