when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Randomize
