I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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