Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
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