I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Randomize
