Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
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