wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
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