went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
