hell yes lets make some ravioli
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
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