i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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