How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize
