Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize