My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize