she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack