Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
These 21 Drunks Said The Darndest Things
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
These 25 Irresponsible People Blew All Their Cash On Drugs, Booze, & Sex
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.