i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
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