PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Randomize
