Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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