he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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