This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Randomize
