Tell her she can't have a vagina
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
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