someone get that fucking seahorse.
my sisters under your porch take her home
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
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