ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Randomize
