oh god the rape fog is back!
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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