take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
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