Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Randomize