Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
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