I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
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