Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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