I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize