I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
