he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
she pinky promised me she was 18
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
