This girl is more easily done than said...
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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