I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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