you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
