1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
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