She's JV to your varsity
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize
