..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
