I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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