Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
