Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
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