Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
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