Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
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The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
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