i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
