The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize