life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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