do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
