I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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