I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
